What’s the best story someone else has recently told you (in person, preferably)? Share it with us, and feel free to embellish — that’s how good stories become great, after all.
I’ve been hearing lots of stories about Dick. I heard he kicked a hole in the sheetrock and stomped a crack in the tub. I heard he got that black eye in a bar fight. I heard he spent a lot of money on guns and ammo; afraid that Hilary Clinton will become president and take everyone’s guns. I heard that the neighbors called the cops on him when he yelled at their kids. I heard he’s drinking more and becoming more confrontational.
I heard he wanted to talk to me.
“He said he felt bad; he knew he’d come down pretty hard on you that day; ten years of pent up frustration, you know?”
“Pffft!” He’s so persecuted.
“He thought, for the sake of the children, maybe you guys could make amends.”
A full year has passed since he called me a “fucking fascist” and hung up the phone. Not a word since. Now, all of a sudden, for the sake of the children? I doubt it, but
I said I’d think about it.
I’d had one moment of compassion for the guy. Imagine, coming home and finding divorce papers where dinner should’ve been; the wife, the children, the sofa, gone. I felt sorry for him and thought maybe I should reach out…
Then I realized that was the wine thinking and I got over it. It’s his own doing, after all. That’s what you get, for being a dick. Divorce papers.
If he’d said something a month ago or six months ago or ten, I might’ve bought it. But now? A full year later? Now he’s grasping at straws. Now he’s desperate because he’s not in control.
I thought about it and I don’t want to talk to him. He doesn’t get another shot at me.
“You can tell him he’s forgiven,” I told her the next day. “He’s forgiven and I hope we can be cordial, if we ever run in to each other. But I don’t think we need to have a big talk.”
I haven’t heard yet, if she told him or how he responded.
Probably pissed him off.